Though one may be overpowered,
two can defend themselves.
A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.
Today, we have been home with Micah Yoseph for one month! I can hardly believe it -- I had to look at a calender to double-check! I am exhausted...my back is terribly sore...but, I am thankful for my weary mind and body that continually remind me how very blessed I am!
Micah seems to be adjusting to us very well! Does he understand that we are his parents? Well, probably not just yet. But he does look to us when he's hungry, tired or has a wet diaper. These are all good indicators that he is seeking us as his care-providers...he has obviously found a significant measure of trust with us. Less and less is he exhibiting what I call a general frustration, which usually surfaces when he's beyond exhausted. I am not sure what he's frustrated about...new surroundings, funny smells, too many white faces...missing his nanny, or the many crying/cooing babies he once shared a room with??? Only he really knows, but whatever the frustration is, it is subsiding.
One of the most surprising things that I've experienced personally (even though I read plenty about it) is my intense desire for mutual bonding & attachment with Micah. I want him to know that I am his mommy; that he is safe with me; that he can look to me with his every need!! I truly did not appreciate the complexity of this process until we got home. It has not been a difficult process at all, but it does require a certain environment: low stimulation & familiar surroundings. Which means we spend alot of time at home, away from friends & family. Just me & Micah; or me, Micah & daddy.
The reality is, Micah was with his birth family for about one month, then he was in an orphanage for at most two months, and then in the transitional home with his nanny for almost five months. So, technically he has been with us the least amount of time during his first year of life.
Is he wondering if we're just another stopping-point on his way to who knows where?
When he is introduced & held by strangers (friends & family), is he wondering, will they be my care-givers next?
So, until he has been with us for at least five months will continue to go solo, so to speak. Some might think we're weird or over-reacting, and I'm perfectly OK with that! Anyone who thinks they can parent an adopted child any better...some thoughts for you: there are plenty of children that need homes...go, adopt your own...then, you can do it your own way!
But, for the most part, we've received unconditional support in Micah's transition. We are thankful beyond words that so many of you are eager to get know Micah and be apart of his life...we want that as well!!! But we also know that what we're doing often looks different from parenting biological children -- and you've given us the freedom to establish ourselves as a family...a cord of three strands...that we pray will not be easily broken in the days & years ahead!